19 June 2013

My Two 'Dads'



It's not what you think it is, but it got you to open up the blog post didn't it?!  In honour of Father's Day, this week's theme over at 'The Gallery' is of course - 'Dads'. Here are the two special Dads in my life:



When searching for a husband, they say that a daughter looks for a man just like her father. 
Were 'they' right?

Throughout my childhood, my Father worked in London - this meant incredibly long commutes and we rarely saw him during the week.  For us, Sundays were about family time - we were very traditional like that.  We would play board games, be forced out on a 'family walk' or play our favourite game of tying my dad up in knots with rope and timing him to see how long it took to get out! 

He rarely rose his voice (not to my sister and I anyway) but we knew when we had crossed the line - a stern look was all it took.  I know that many of my friends were scared of him and despite his small stature (all 5'7") he was and still is, a formidable man.  Growing up I occasionally questioned (not outwardly) his need to exert his authority in what, at the time, I felt were 'unfair circumstances' but now I'm an adult, I understand why and thank him for it.  I know that his driving force was always to turn us into well-rounded human beings.

My Dad is a very sociable man, thrives on being the leader in a group and he commands respect.  He is honest, reliable and his faith means everything to him - there is no doubt that God is number one in his life.  In many ways, at 76 years of age, he is still very much the same man I knew growing up - fit, healthy, endless amounts of energy and a cup that is always, always half full (or probably 3/4 full if that were an expression!).  In other ways however, I see that the years have turned him into a softer, more gentle man, one who I can relate to as one adult to another.  He is a great encouragement to us as a family and as I said in my Father's Day card - he's always there for us and for that I am truly grateful.

Partly due to the birth of  the 'new man' back in the 1990's, my husband couldn't be more different.  He runs his own business but still manages to enjoy breakfast with his family every day and is near enough always home for dinner by 6.30pm. He is extremely good at separating work from family life and sees his daily presence in the home as vital.

When the children were tiny he was always very 'hands on' (during the day anyway, not so keen at night for some reason!) and now that they are bigger, this hasn't changed - willing to help out with lifts to and from activities and even known to voluntarily get the iron out on a Sunday night!  He recognises that a mother's role has changed considerably over the years and now that I work too, he is resigned more than happy to take his share of the load and is a dab hand at washing the kitchen floor :)

Unlike me, he finds too many social activities draining and I'm never sure if it's for this reason or because he's such a great family man, that he would always rather spend time as just the 5 of us.  He is a leader in the workplace but inclined to take a backseat in other areas of his life....good job too with me as his wife!

Recently, the OH and I have been struggling with a certain parenting 'issue' and I know that this year, more than any other, he has questioned whether he is a good Dad.  For me, the very fact that he even notices or feels the need to address this, demonstrates that he is one of the best.

So in answer to the initial question....I'm not sure that these two Dads do have many similarities but one thing I do know is that this saying applies to both of the wonderful Dads in my life and I'm very blessed to have them.....




If you're a woman reading this - does your husband remind you of your own father or did you go in search of somebody who is completely the opposite?!  
I am linking this post up with The Gallery over at The Sticky Fingers Blog.
 
TheGallery

26 comments:

  1. Aww that's a very lovely post about the 2 Dads in your life. Your dad reminds me of mine a lot. It would only ever take a look from him to make us stop bring naughty. My OH is so different from my dad in some respects but it others he could be his son!

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    1. Whatever happened to that kind of authority eh? My kids would totally ignore me if I just used a stern look!

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  2. Such a lovely post. Love the comparison between new men and old... My Grandfather was horrified when he saw my husband changing a nappy, something he had never ever done! :D

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    1. Amazing how things change isn't it? I don't think my dad had ever been asked to change a nappy until he got left with his Grandchildren!

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  3. It's amazing how two people can be so different from each other, yet still love and can be loved by the same people!

    Personally, I think being the 'modern' man is a much better 'place' to be - I love being directly involved with my children! Maybe my own Dad thinks the same when thinking about my grandfather! I wonder what my daughter's future husband (yikes - the thought of it!!!!) will think about me...

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    1. I think the role of a Grandparent is a lovely one - being able to enjoy but not having to do the disciplining. I'm looking forward to it already! (and trying to blank out the possibility of being a mother in law!) THanks for commenting :)

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  4. Aww what a lovely post. Amazing sounding people x

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    1. Thank you Susan. It was lovely to write too :)

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  5. Loved reading this, so lovely. My partner reminds me a little of my Dad {ish}. With regards to his old fashioned ways of honouring the woman your with, respecting them, working hard to provide for his family & more. :) x

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    1. Thank you Deborah for reading and commenting :) I think some of the old-fashioned ways are definitely the best x

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  6. Great post. I hadn't thought about it until I wrote my post today but the characteristics I value most in my Dad are ones my Husband has also, maybe there is some truth to it.

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    1. Thank you Lou. Interesting when you start to think about it, isn't it?

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  7. A lovely post, so thoughtful. Although I sadly didn't know my father very well, my husband is quite like him in a several ways, I think he would have approved. Popping over from The Gallery.

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    1. So sorry to hear that you didn't really know your father but a relief to think that he would have approved of your choice in husband! Thanks for commenting :)

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  8. Aww, lovely post. My DH is about as different to my father as two people can be. I wouldn't have had kids with someone like my father.

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    1. That's sad to hear Jacq. Glad you've found a good'un in your DH :)

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  9. What a beautiful post Suzanne, you've got some great men in your life. I'm sure my husband has some of my dad's traits :)

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  10. awww Suzanne I love this post its so so beautiful xx

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  11. Lovely. My husband and Dad are pretty different but both fab. Just wish my hubbie had my Dads DIY skills

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  12. Sounds to me like your OH (lovely to see a pic of him BTW) is more like your dad than you think. He's just living in a different era and culture. Lovely pic.

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  13. What a lovely tribute to the clearly - children aside - two most important men in your life. What they clearly do have in common is a passion for life and lots of energy. x

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    1. They certainly do OM. It was interesting to sit and write this. They also both have drive and ambition....something I admire :)

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  14. Lovely post, they both sound like very great dad's in their own very unique way x

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  15. What a lovely and thoughtful post. My husband is not like my dad but I'm sure that it's because I had a good relationship with my father that I was able to find a good partner who is an excellent father too.

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  16. A beautiful post, both your Dads sound great. mih x

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